APUK Blog

A heartfelt personal reflection on Autistic motherhood, written by one of our peer supporters.

Account and artwork by Esther Whitney (aka Doctor Doom) In the third trimester, I became all-consumed by anxiety about becoming a mother. It was my first baby and I couldn’t imagine what it would be like, or whether I would cope. The closest comparison I had was my training as a nursery nurse. I expressed my overwhelming anxieties about motherhood to professionals hoping that they would provide some reassurance and support. Unfortunately, I was repeatedly told that they coul

by Esther Whitney (artist name: Dr Doom) Having grown up watching Disney movie after Disney movie (such as The Lion King, Dumbo, etc). It’s often portrayed that as soon as a baby is born Mother and baby have this intense gush of love and instantly develop an unbreakable bond. When I gave birth to my daughter, almost 6 years ago, I assumed that we would bond instantly and I would be consumed by this intense flood of love. In reality, our bonding process was completely differe

By Esther Whitney ( artist name: Doctor Doom ) Content overview: Discussion of difficult breastfeeding experience and unsupportive professionals. This painting explores my experience of breastfeeding as an Autistic parent. I have used colour symbolism to represent the spectrum of intense emotions and sensory input I experienced. I had my first baby in 2016, I was extremely anxious, I had nothing to compare Motherhood to. I put a lot of time into researching the benefits of b

[Video/audio reading available soon] Having knowledge about pregnancy and birth is important for reducing anxiety and becoming your own advocate. When I spoke with other Autistic parents about this one of the general themes that came up was wishing they knew more about their rights during the transition to parenthood. You are likely to be offered several diagnostic tests during pregnancy from your first appointment with the midwife and continually until the early postnatal p

The first 12 weeks of pregnancy (counting from the first day of the last menstrual cycle) is called the first-trimester.